flood

there’s so many things that i want to write about right now. so many thoughts are flooding my brain!

i want to write about the time that i really felt betrayed by someone. duh. it was not his fault. it was my fault that i expected more from a stranger.

i want to write about how excited i am for my OJT this summer. but since up until now i still haven’t decided where i will have my OJT, i am worried too. should i choose being away from home for almost two months and get out of my comfort zone, or should i just settle for security and refuse to take the risk?

i want to write about how excited i am for my father’s arrival. there’s so many things that i want to tell him. i miss him so much. i just realized that half of my life, he’s not with me. i’m 19 now and he left to work abroad when i was 10. growing up without him is really hard.

i also want to write about how i enjoyed our “haircut day” with my friends. i missed spending time with the five of them. i mean we hang out everyday but it was only now that the six of us are present. haha. because of busy schedules and other priorities, we seldom find time to catch up and it really sucks because being the oversensitive person that i am, i sometimes feel that they’re drifting away. hehe. but i am happy that nothing has changed in the friendship that we built.

the thoughts are gushing back and forth so fast.. faster than my typing skills… and my eyes are slowly getting sleepy.. so maybe i’ll just confide these to my ever loyal and loving confidante who never gets tired of my inconsistency. i miss talking to him.

– darksphere

internship + school work + global recession

i have a lot of things in my mind right now. i am so worried about my internship. it’ll be february next week and that means i am running out of time in searching for companies to apply for OJT(on-the-job training)/internship. by march it should be finalized. i still need to go to Davao for our little vacation and of course to visit my grandma. i miss the Davao-life so much so i can’t miss that opportunity to visit before i start my OJT.

school’s boring me to death. i really hate my schedule. most of my classes are in the afternoon and it usually rains in the afternoon. so since i hate walking in the rain in the mud, sometimes i skip classes. fortunately, during my lazy days, our teachers don’t come to school also. haha. everything’s conspiring for my benefit eh? but what i hate more about my studies is that my teachers are not pressuring us. haha. i mean we still don’t have deadlines,  they are still not giving us hints that we’ll need to start sooner or else we’ll fail. ugh. i don’t understand them. i don’t want to panic when the end of the semester is nearing! is this some kind of a tactic against students? haha. i really need to start working on those requirements ASAP. as much as possible, i can’t let them win. haha

so Obama is now the 44th president of the United States. i honestly like him. he doesn’t only have the charisma that won him the presidency, but he has this vibe/feel that he really is someone very different from all the others. like anything he wants or orders, i won’t doubt if people will follow because majority knows it’s for the good of everybody. i really hope America will be able to counter this financial crisis so that the dependent economies will also recover. i am aware about this crisis since it started maybe but it was not THAT big of a deal to me before. i mean, i’m affected of the soaring high of prices but what i found out today really left me thinking deeply. then i started to panic. haha. i need to find a job. no i need to do better in my studies. ok i need at least a part-time job. but how about my scheduled overnights for our school requirements? hahaha. then.. silence.. i need to relax. haha things can sometimes go out of hand but God’s not gonna leave me. because of what i found out today, i realized that i need to set my priorities straight from now on. i think i discarded a lot of things that i should be mainly considering. maybe this is a way of reminding me what are practically more important.

-darksphere