It’s been a while since I posted in this blog. I was thinking of closing this and switching to tumblr for my personal blog. But I realized that Tumblr is such a happy place and I feel that it’s not appropriate to post my rants and sentimental thoughts there. So here I am.. Back home.. hehe!

I just came back from a pre-summer retreat. Words are not enough to describe how I feel right now after that wonderful experience. It was just what I needed. Before the school year ended, I told myself that I’d look for a summer camp or summer retreat. I am looking for something that will change my life, divert me from depression because I can’t graduate, and just let me be away from worries, disappointments, and problems even for just a while. I received a message weeks back but since my family is Roman Catholic I was hesitant to attend. Though they did not disagree with me attending bible studies with Christians from other religions, they are very vocal in their opinions about that religion and always reminded me that I am still a Roman Catholic. So yeah, I have also been “away” from God for quite some time. I have not been feeding my soul lately. I’m also very anti-social and an introvert so I was sort of scrared that if I go, there might be a lot of people that I don’t know and I might feel out-of-place. Good thing I was able to overcome my hesitations and went to the retreat.

I’m so happy and blessed for that wonderful weekend. I was able to talk to Him again heart-to-heart. I poured my heart out and cried. I wanted that retreat. I wanted a trip away from the face of disappointment I see in the mirror everyday. I wanted some time to talk to Him, and think about everything that happened, how it happened, and what I’m going to do in the future. I’ve been breezing through all the uncertainties, disappointments, and failures because I didn’t want to show to my family how weak I am. It was definitely not an accident that I came to that retreat. It was part of a plan. It feels so good to be free from the loads I’ve been carrying for months. It feels so good to meet new people. It feels so good to give thanks and offer Him songs of worship again. I’m so undeserving but He loves me. When I reach for Him, He takes my hand and carries me. No one else can love me with a love so great other than Jesus. I’m so inspired and my spirit is refreshed and renewed..